And what did footballers learn at skool?

Ever been a tad envious at those massive wages footballers earn, the Ferraris, stately homes and jet-setting life? Just remember when they were at school they didn't do any work like we did, they just dreamt about the film-star lifestyle they were going to enjoy. So when it came to learning English, maths or geography unlike us they didn't bother. One day they will need to know what the square root of 126 is, the name of the capital of Namibia or what an adjective is and unlike us they won't know! Doesn't that make us feel good! Some of the things they wouldn't have said if they had leant anything at school....

"Maths is totally done differently to what I was teached when I was at school."
David Beckham (and English was probably teached differently as well)

"I’d love the person who taught Jose Mourinho English to taught me."
Steve Claridge, who may have gone to the same school as David Beckham!

"Paul Lambert has learned Fabian Delph the game."
Paul Merson

"I've had 14 bookings this season, 8 of which were my fault, but 7 of which were disputable."
Paul Gascoigne

"Think of a number between 10 and 11."
Ron Atkinson

"Samuel Eto'o is reputedly the highest-paid player in the world at £350,000 per week - that's £5,000 a day."
Clive Tyldesley

"When you are 4-0 up you should never lose 7-1.”
Lawrie McMenemy

 "Real’s second goal made it 3-0."
Des Lynam

“All that remains is for a few dots and commas to be crossed.”
Mitchell Thomas

"The 2,000 away fans will be unhappy. In fact half of them have gone, there's only 500 left."
Chris Waddle

"....and so they have not been able to improve their 100% record."
Radio Commentator

"The possession stats at one point were 77% to 33%."
Mick Quinn

"With Harry, two plus two always makes five, not three."
Milan Mandaric

"You need at least eight or nine men in a ten-man wall."
Mark Lawrenson

"I can count on the fingers of one hand ten games where we’ve caused our own downfall."
Joe Kinnear

"Four minutes to go…..four long minutes….360 seconds."
Alistair Alexander

 "Aston Villa are seventh in the league. That’s almost as high as you can get without being one of the top six."
Ian Payne

"We must have had 99 per cent of the match. It was the other three per cent that cost us."
Ruud Gullitt

"Ireland will give 99% - everything they’ve got."
Mark Lawrenson

"Even though two and two might look like four, it could be three or five."
Kevin Keegan getting close to the right answer...but....

"The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23."
Kevin Keegan, he was completely wrong on that one!

 "Well, Harry, fifth place last year, how can you better that?"
Fergus Sweeney

 "And some 500 Italians made the trip, in a crowd of only 400."
Radio Commentator

"If Glenn Hoddle said one word to his team at half-time, it was concentration and focus."
Ron Atkinson

 "Chile have three options - they could win or they could lose."
Kevin Keegan

"One thing about Germany – they’ll be organised, they’ll be big and they’ll be strong."
Ally McCoist, now that's three things!

"I'd like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona"
Mark Draper

 "I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country."
Ian Rush on his spell at Juventus

 "The Belgians will play like their fellow Scandinavians, Denmark and Sweden."
Andy Townsend

"What I saw in Holland and Germany was that the majority of people are Dutch in Holland and German in Germany."
Peter Taylor

"Argentina won't be at Euro 2000 because they are from South America."
Kevin Keegan who was listening in that lesson!

"Well, Clive, it's all about the two Ms - movement and positioning."
Ron Atkinson

 "What do you think of Manchester United's three Rs - Rooney, Ronaldo and van Nistelrooy?"
Rob McCaffrey

 "Mark Hughes crossed every I and dotted every T."
Robbie Savage getting it all wrong!

And David Beckham obviously didn't stay awake in 
Religious Knowledge lessons as he once had this to say -
"I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened though I don’t know into what religion yet."