Cricket

If there's one sport that seems to be able to match football with its Colemanballs surely it's cricket. I guess with commentators having to do their business for up to five days they are bound to have a lot more to say, whether it be intended or unintended. But to me a Colemanball can only be unintended and not rehearsed and I wonder if the long periods of cricket inactivity give the commentators time to make up a phrase or two which they can drop in at an appropriate moment? Were some of the cricketing classics prepared in advance I wonder.......

"The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey"
famously said by Brian Johnston when Peter Willey faced Michael Holding.

"As he comes in to bowl Fred Titmus has got two short legs, one of them square"
also from the late and great Brian Johnston.

"It was an excellent performance in the field marred only when Harris dropped Crapp in the outfield."
BBC commentator (Jack Crapp was the batsman!)

"Botham just couldn't quite get his leg over"
Yes I think that one passes the test of being a Colemanball, said by Jonathan Agnew about Ian Botham who overbalanced while attempting a hook and as he tried to step over the stumps he knocked off a bail.

And a few more to keep you going.....

"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."
David Ackfield and....

"That slow-motion replay doesn't show how fast the ball was travelling."
Richie Benaud

"Yorkshire were 232 all out, Hutton ill. I'm sorry, Hutton 111."
John Snagge

"A very small crowd here today. I can count the people on one hand. Can't be more than 30."
Michael Abrahamson

"That was a tremendous six - the ball was still in the air as it went over the boundary."
Fred Trueman

Clearly the West Indies are going to play their normal game, which is what they normally do."
Tony Greig

"It's a unique occasion really - a repeat of Melbourne 1977."
Jim Laker

"England have nothing to lose here, apart from this Test match."
David Lloyd

"And we don't need a calculator to tell us that the run-rate required is 4.5454 per over."
Christopher Martin-Jenkins

"Umpire Fenwick just twitches his nose, instead of putting his finger up in the usual way."
Paul Allott

"The Port Elizabeth ground is more of a circle than an oval. It is long and square."
Trevor Bailey and...

The Queen's Park Oval, exactly as its name suggests - absolutely round."
Tony Cozier

"On the first day Logie decided to chance his arm and it came off."
Trevor Bailey

"The only change England would propose might be to replace Derek Pringle, who remains troubled by no balls."
A Times report

"With regard to the broken finger, when batting I'll just have to play it by ear."
Marcus Trescothick

"Unless something happens that we can't predict, I don't think a lot will happen."
Fred Trueman

"His throw went absolutely nowhere near where it was going."
Richie Benaud

"This shirt is unique - there are only 200 of them."
Richie Benaud

"Flintoft starts in, his shadow beside him. Where else would it be?"
Henry Blofeld

"Who could forget Malcolm Devon?"
Ted Dexter it seems...he's Devon Malcolm

"I have prepared for the worst case scenario, but it could be even worse than that."
Monty Panesar